Blonde jokes

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Next blonde jokes »

How do you plant dope?
Bury a blonde.

Rating: 3.0 |

A friend meets up with her friend as she is picking her car up from the mechanic.

Her friend asks, "Everything ok with your car now?"

The blonde replies, "Yes, thank goodness. I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, so I was relieved when he told me all I needed was blinker fluid."

Rating: 3.6 |

A blonde bought a brand new car and decided to drive down from some place far off, to meet this friend. She reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, she decided to return, and called up her mother to expect her in the evening. But she didn't reach home in the evening and not the next day either. When she finally reached home on the third day, her distraught mother ran and asked her what happened?

She got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "These car designers are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!"

Rating: 3.4 |

A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year

old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it.

"Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.

Rating: 3.8 |

While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not.

I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?"

The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."

Rating: 3.0 |

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